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Disadvantages of dating an older man

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As if the world of dating didn’t already have enough nuances and complications, differences in age between you and your significant other can be a common source of complication.Whether you are currently dating someone or considering dating someone who differs greatly in age from yourself, read on to see what you can expect from a relationship with this kind of age gap involved.Depending on what phase of your life you currently find yourself in (college, your first job, or divorced in your 40s), it can be hard to get to a deeper level with someone who’s just not in the same place.If you’re still frequenting the local campus pub every weekend and your boyfriend is 30 and thinking about marriage, chances are the relationship is doomed, unless one of you is willing to make serious sacrifices.

Brooks calls this “the enchantment leap”—when “something dry and utilitarian erupts into something passionate, inescapable and devotional.” The algorithmic relies on the measurable, and thus most often depends on the physical, as Brooks points out.

Through apps like OKCupid and Tinder, we’ve learned to emphasize the temporary and the sensually gratifying in our pursuit of love.

But enchantment requires us to look beyond ourselves and our temporary desires—it requires us to give up control, or as Brooks puts it, to become “vulnerable.” Part of the reason we love quantification—of our love lives, our vocations, even our pastimes—is because we love having a sense of control, the reassurance of a pleasurable outcome.

but dating when you have FOUR kids is like the Mt Everest of the dating world!

It seems almost impossible for men to see past that.